A Tribe Called to Quest

I recently went to a FIRE-community event and had a grand old time. It was really great talking to people who not only are into FIRE as a concept and a goal, but who are passionate in their quest for it. Just as fantastic was being able to talk to people on the same wavelength as me about our general approach to life and who instantly and innately understand some “unconventional” decisions we’ve made. No explanations or context necessary. As is fashionable to say in the FIRE community, I was with my tribe. 

During the course of the event, it occurred to me that we FIRE breathers often react wholly differently than the rest of society to many of these “unconventional” decisions. Here are a few examples.

No work for you!

Example Number One is how we react to someone saying that he or she is leaving their job to stop working or retire at some age well before 60–65 years old, or take a long sabbatical mid-career, or to pursue a far-less lucrative job or career.

Outside the FIRE community, the common reaction from someone upon hearing this news, I have found firsthand, is great concern. The person might say things like, “Oh, my! I’m so sorry.” or “Are you alright?” or “Are you in bad health?” or “Do you have anything lined up?” or “Are you worried you won’t find anything?” And so on and so forth. There might be a lot of concerned talking behind the FIRE breather’s back, too.

We FIRE breathers see things completely a little differently. I know this firsthand, too. At the recent event that I attended, and at another FIRE-community event that I went to earlier this year, I mentioned to several people that I plan to FIRE and leave my job at the end of the year. The reaction I got from everyone went something like this, “That’s awesome! Congratulations!” When then asked what I plan to do after FIREing, I mentioned that I just want to not work for a while, but do have some side hustles and also want to do volunteer work. The reaction I got from everyone went something like this, “That’s awesome! Congratulations!”

Love it.

Buy to rent

I used to believe the conventional wisdom that buying a home is always . . . always . . . a smarter financial decision than renting. The Missus and I bought two condos while under that spell, which society, family, and friends had cast upon us. But then I learned that renting often can be the smarter financial decision. That’s not at all to say that one ought to rent instead of buy if the math points toward renting. There are a multitude of reasons that buying might be the better decision for someone notwithstanding the math. But knowing the math sure does seem important for making an informed decision and for at least gaining an understanding that the conventional wisdom is false. 

When we tell people in our everyday life that we rent, they respond as if we are either uneducated dolts, or assume that we’re struggling financially. Or, because we live in a fast-growing part of the country, they say things like, “Yeah, I know the housing prices in your area are really high. Do you think you’ll be able to save up for a down payment so that you can buy soon?” The assumption being that we’ll buy and that we, like them, of course “know” that buying is the unquestionable smart move.

We FIRE breathers are, at the very least, more open minded and deliberate. At the event I recently went to, I met a couple who once owned their home but a few years ago became renters. Like us, the couple plowed the not-insignificant proceeds from the sale of their home into index funds. But also like us, they’d previously bought into the conventional wisdom. And, it seemed, like us they’d gotten—and continued to get—unsupportive reactions from others in their lives who knew that they were now renting. 

I was the person who brought up living arrangements during the conversation with the wife. When I mentioned to her that we were erstwhile buyers who’d become enthusiastic renters, I saw her facial expression change from one with no particular expression to one that practically screamed, “Yyyaaasss! Finally, someone who understands us and our decision to rent!” Had this woman—whom I’d known for all of about 15 minutes by that point—lunged at me to give me a great big bear hug, I not only wouldn’t have been surprised, I’d have totally understood the inspiratioin.

Love it.

Welllll, whaddya gonna do?

Like most people, I’d always thought that voluntarily walking away from a job well before traditional retirement age was just something that only uber-wealthy or recent lottery winners did. Certainly not riff-raff like me and The Missus, we being longtime, well-compensated working professionals with projected rising incomes. I mean, we’d be crazy to walk away from careers like that, no matter the baggage that comes with them. Amiright?! 

I’ve discussed on this blog the stress that I’ve felt from my job and my decades-long career in the legal industry. In no small part it’s that that motivated me to pursue FIRE (the overwheming main reason for my pursuit being to realize the options that FI affords). Learning that one not only could walk away from a career, but could do so with the “insurance policy” that is (some measure of) financial security, was a game-changer for me.

In speaking to the couple I mentioned above, I explained the influence that work-/career-related stress had on my decision to FIRE. I added that after I FIRE, I plan to mostly take it easy for an undetermined amount of time so as to hopefully detoxify myself of at least some of the latent stress I’ve labored under. The husband nodded hard and repeatedly, and said several times, “Yep, I totally get that!” This time it was me whose facial expression changed to one that practically screamed, “Yes! Yes! Yes! Finally, someone who understands me and the decision I’ve made!”

Love it. 

And in the end . . .

I’m planning on getting more involved in the IRL FIRE community once I leave my job at the end of the year. I’m not just a little excited about that, especially coming off the high of the recent event I went to. Part of the motiovation is just to hang out more often with like-minded people. But it’s also so I hopefully can learn new things from them. After all, it’s learning from that tribe and deliberately not doing the Same Ol’ Thing as the vast majority of other tribes that got me to where I am now.